I got my swim trunks, and my flippy floppies.

Echoing Forth’s sentiments, we are extremely pressed for time nowadays, and blogging is rare. Of course I know more of you like Cup of Angst anyway, so I don’t feel too bad about that. However, we DID have time to jet out to Los Angeles for my cousin’s wedding, which was pretty awesome. First of all…..WE SAW DOLPHINS. And it was amazing…well, sort of…from what we could see. Forth and I knew all about what they were doing thanks to this lovely documentary:

Naturally while we were in California, I was hoping to run into John Mayer, but unfortunately had no such luck. According to Twitter though, he was in Santa Monica during the last day we were in Cali. Speaking of celebrities that Twitter…..and I’ve Twit-stalked the likes of Nicole Richie, Taylor Swift, Joel Madden, Ashlee Simpson, Pete Wentz, Jessica Simpson, the new Disney Channel sluts, and etc….and I have to say, they seem more normal when you keep up with the inane drivel of their everyday lives. Sure you’ve got them jetting off to Paris and St. Lucia and meeting Mark Hoppus for lunch at the Ivy on Tuesday afternoon, but once you put that behind you….they’re just overprivileged, untalented kids like us.

Another novelty Forth and I stumbled upon while cruising the area outside our hotel was:

Yes. In-N-Out Burger: the White Castle of the West. I like to jump right into these regional gemstones when I come upon them, so Forth and I made sure we stopped in for lunch on Saturday afternoon. First of all, there was a freaking line out the door. Have you ever seen that happen at your local Mickey D’s? I didn’t think so. Second of all, the drive thru line looked to be about a 15 minute wait. It was so bad, there was even an In-N-Out bitch employee outside taking orders at people’s cars. Intense, eh? Certainly makes the name of the joint sound like bullshit–I’ve never waited so long for a burger. Anyways, once inside, we saw the goodness people had been talking about. First of all, the menu is based on the adage, “Keep it simple, stupid.” What can you order, you ask? A burger, a cheeseburger, or a “Double Double.” Of course there is also soda, fries, and a small shake selection, but that’s IT. No confusing clubs or grilled chicken or any of that useless crap. Nah, just gimme a damn burger. The interior is all retro palm tree and of course the workers (little effers who make about $2 more than I do at my miserable coffee job!…my relatives kept reminding me about the cost of living. WI vs. CA? Bitch, please.) have to wear ridiculous hats and ’50’s style outfits, but that’s the choice they make. It would appear the only nod to modernity they’ve adopted is the soda machine and notion of “combo meals.” Anyways, another shocker that Forth pointed out was the break in the Latino workforce inside the confines of In-N-Out. Everywhere you go in Los Angeles, there are Mexicans doing the jobs nobody else wants to. Mowing the lawn, pumping gas, waiting tables–but nope…not at In-N-Out. Perhaps it’s the CEO’s fondness for the “Leave It to Beaver” lifestyle, but all the kids working the grill were Aryan-looking Abercrombie models in-training. Tan lines and all.

As for the food….In-N-Out did not disappoint (that’s what she said?). The burger (we both ordered Double Double meals) was absolutely delicious. Forth nearly kept the wrapper in came in, which proclaimed that the beef was never frozen, they’d been using non-trans fat oil for years, etc. However, the fries left something to be desired. If one could pair an In-N-Out burger with Mickey D’s fries, it would be like fastfoodgasm in a bag. Oh, if only.

But of course the experience ended and we came home to 40-degree fog and drizzle and my insides turned black and died for awhile, but we got over it. Anyways, we apologize again for the lack of bloggage, but today was my last day of undergrad classes EVER, and next week the security blanket of being able to call myself a student will be yanked from beneath my tepid form, so needless to say…..I’m gonna have some time on my hands.

**Back.

P.S–Here is a bonus photo of Forth’s junk, detailing the damage done after he got raped by the Pacific. The sea was angry that day, my friends…and apparently wanted a piece of the family jewels.